6/21/2018 The Truth

I have been reading this The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath. I have some of her poetry, but never really thought to read her journals. But, being a woman who was deeply affected by her poetry, I figured the journals would be a wonderful read as well. I was not wrong in this. To be honest, reading it kind of made me feel uncomfortable due to how much I related to the material. It’s so odd I think, when we find things in life from people that lived whole other lives outside of our time, that remind us so much of ourselves.

Her journals offer up a glimpse into the mind of a very intelligent woman whose obsession with her husband was a bit embarrassing to read about at points. But she was so intense, and honest, and completely obsessed with analyzing everything, including the inner workings of her own mind and those around her. The pure innocence and rawness of her emotions is what made her writing so beautiful but left me feeling exausted.

One note on the organization of the book though, it was a bit textbook-ish, and I think the book could have been better organized for the general reader. This is a good book though, so give it a go. Read The Bell Jar too, it's wonderful.

​This is a picture of her and her hubby Ted, she was a beautiful woman; a very sad, tragic, and beautiful woman. Everyone should read a book based around mental health. You never know when you or someone you love may need that wisdom.

​“I talk to God, but the sky is empty.”

I am alone tonight, completely alone. My husband is out of town for another two weeks, which is normal for around here, but my kids are gone to the grandparents’ house. It is summer break and they long to be anyplace but home, so it is very quiet here tonight. It has been very quiet here this whole week. It is odd. I have found myself pacing around the house wondering what to do since they aren’t here.

I went out to eat with some friends tonight, then I stopped and got an ice cream. I came home and talked to Sheila for a bit, who I am always so thankful for, because she will always talk to me, no matter what. No matter how busy she is, and she always knows how to ground me. She will always tell me the truth. I want the truth. I long for it in every conversation. Damn I wish everyone was just honest and giving with their thoughts sometimes. I try to be, and people make me feel like it's a flaw. I am tired of meaningless conversations, and quelled emotions. Sheila never holds back, and she is always honest with me. I miss her bad.

There is a tree frog outside my bedroom window singing right now and it’s wonderful. I think I will go outside and lay under the stars while.